Category Archives for "Live Simply"
It's so natural when we're sick to reach for the most convenient fix and get on with our lives as soon as possible. Who has time for sickness, right? It's not in our plans. It messes life up. But the quick fix is not always the long game fix. And sometimes there is no quick fix at all.
I wasn't brought up with naturopathy. There's nothing 'hippy' about my parents, except that they had me. In fact, I only discovered naturopathy as an adult, when a friend suggested I might find a new approach to my long term niggles. I'd like to say I immediately transformed my life. More truthfully, I gradually learnt from naturopaths over time to improve my lifestyle, and many of my health issues faded away. This is no miracle cure, and you will never hear me suggest avoiding medical intervention, but naturopathy helped me to build a foundation for health that meant my body was well able to deal with any minor issues that came along.
The naturopathic approach helped me completely resolve what had been debilitating premenstrual pain and nausea, food intolerances that completely ruled my ability to digest - including a few weeks of vomiting on a daily basis, recover from grief and restore my resilience when stress and burnout took over. I experience less allergies and colds, no longer get tonsillitis (doctors were starting to talk about removing my tonsils) and look healthier.
So what is different about the naturopathic approach? While you of course must have an assessment by a naturopath for specific strategies for you, there is a way of thinking that can benefit you regardless of your health concerns. The first step is to view your health issue through the 6 layers of the therapeutic order.
1. Establish the conditions for health by identifying and removing factors that disturb your health, and creating a healthy lifestyle for yourself.
Truth time. What in your lifestyle continues to disturb your health? Is your job ridiculously stressful? Do you propel through your day on caffeine power? Consider not only what you eat and drink but also smoking, alcohol or drugs, exercise levels, stress, lack of sleep and anything that intuitively pops into your mind when you reflect on what could be disturbing your health. More generally, where could your lifestyle be healthier? Focus on crowding out unhelpful habits with amazing nutrition, gentle exercise, mindfulness or meditation and deep sleep.
2. Stimulate your body's ability to heal itself
In naturopathy we call this "the healing power of nature". But it's less about the nature out there, and more about the very nature of our body. Our bodies are all designed to restore us to balance as best they can. Support your general self healing abilities by grounded coping strategies, spending time in nature, practicing yoga or swimming or other gentle exercise and pursue the joys of life to give you natural energy. And laugh!
3. Address weakened systems or organs
We must never ignore what our body tells us, but we can support its ability to heal itself. For example, if you're prone to colds and respiratory infections - don't just medicate the symptoms, work to build up your immune system over time. If you have severe PMS, consider how to gently balance your hormones and stress levels. If being locked in cubicle nation keeps you stiff and sore, implement a stretching practice to keep your muscles comfortable rather than relying on pain killers. Whatever organ or system has been affected in your health history, learn ways to actively support that system through your nutrition and lifestyle.
4. Correct structural integrity
Some of our health issues may be contributed to or exacerbated by holding tension, spinal issues or old injuries. Pilates, yoga, physiotherapy, therapeutic massage, osteopathy or chiropractics may support your overall health. Surely you don't need convincing to have a massage!
5. Address pathologies using natural and/or pharmacologic substances
There's no doubt that the above remedies offer benefits to all of us, but there are times when illnesses need medicine. This is where this layer of the approach comes in. Engage with health professionals you trust. If you do choose to see a naturopath, be aware that in Australia and many other countries, there is no regulation of who can call themselves by this title, so don't be afraid to ask for qualifications and association memberships. And while each of us must make their own health choices, I encourage you to always have a great doctor in your corner, even if you use natural approaches as well.
6. Suppress or surgically remove pathology
Where emergencies exist or no other approach will do the job, we may need to suppress or surgically remove an illness. Dangerous fevers, quickly multiplying pathogens, anything of a severe nature and growths and tumours may well need surgery or active suppression by your medical professionals. Be open to this where needed, and support your body by using the other layers of support as well.
So there you have it, the 6 steps of approaching your health from a naturopathic perspective. Surprised to see doctors and surgeons included? Don't be. Gone are the times when we had to choose one side of the fence or the other. Naturopathy is no longer viewed as an alternative to allopathic medicine, but rather its complement. I may be studying naturopathy but there are also times when surgery or allopathic medicine was the immediate answer for me (afterwards followed up by natural restorative practices). So regardless of your health, consider all the layers where you could heal. If one approach hasn't worked for you, try the others. And be kind to yourself.
I'd love to hear from you - which of these approaches have you not yet tried in your health? And what will you implement now? Let me know in the comments below.
For further reading about the therapeutic order, look here.
I write a blog about resilience. But a few weeks ago, I could barely get through a day without naps. I would wake up in the morning, and within a couple of hours lie down for a 3 hour sleep. And another in the afternoon. And 10 more hours overnight.
True, it was for good reason, as it was the first trimester of my pregnancy. But I felt like all the work I'd put into recovering from burnout had somehow failed. And worse - I wasn't pursuing any of my goals. My writing ground to a halt. And a previous all-honours student in my naturopathy degree, I found myself avoiding any attempts at my pharmacology subject until days before the exam. Sidebar - pharmacology is not a subject where one can phone it in!
It brought me back to a time where I went from an enthusiastic employee working 12 hour days even in the days before my own wedding, to someone who crashed and burned under what felt like the crushing weight of grief and overwhelm.
The truth is, fatigue and its causes are never part of our ambitions or dreams. Ask every kid you know what they want to be when they grow up. There may be a variety of answers - teachers, astronauts and (at my niece's recent 6th grade graduation) YouTube stars. But I'll guarantee not a single one will reply "I just want to be in a place where I have to drag myself up each morning and put every ounce of energy I have into surviving the daily grind".
And most of us who have experienced burnout, chronic fatigue or anything similar, do not start out that way. More often, we look back and think "I gave too much, more than I was able to replenish". So for us, the ones who want to give our all, we can feel like failures when it seems there's nothing we have left to offer. We watch our colleagues shining bright like perhaps we used to, or admire a super-mum friend who somehow manages to do it all, or think of the big night out we're missing because we can't scrape ourselves off the couch. And it's hard not to feel kicked by failure.
But here's the thing - fatigue is our teacher. If we stop to listen, it can show us where our lives have been out of balance. It invites us to practice gentleness within, as no amount of self judgement will help. And it creates space to reflect on the meaning we attribute to our lives, and a chance to realign our deepest values.
If you find yourself in a place of excessive or prolonged fatigue, here are some places to start:
Now I'd love to hear from you - what was the greatest lesson from your fatigue? And which tools either helped you or will you try?
At no other time of year do we fall so deeply for the image of how life is "supposed' to look. We are bombarded with images of amazing feasts, expensive gifts, happy families and buzzing social lives. The Christmas lights are dazzling.
But the brighter the lights, the longer the shadows. Some of us have different Christmas stories. The lights show in stark relief our Christmas ghosts, and the cracks in our Christmas picture.
It might be that you have a loss, or many losses, in your life which sting most at this time of year. Someone whose place at the table is empty this year. The child you thought you'd be hanging a stocking for, who Santa does not visit. The parent who in their absence is felt even more than they were in their presence. The partner you were going to spend a life with.
Or it may be that you feel your story doesn't measure up. Family fights. Money too tight for the gifts you wanted to give. Stress and overwhelm.
Here's how I roll with Christmas, perhaps one of these ideas will help:
Merry Christmas and Happy Hanukkah to you my friend! And no matter the size or form of your Christmas shadows, may you always find the Christmas lights within.
I bet you've been there before - you feel exhausted, find the supplement that promises to give your energy back... and, nothing. "Maybe it's true that supplements are just formulas for expensive urine" you tell yourself in frustration, and give up. But don't listen to the naysayers. I've seen the transformation the right natural prescription can have on my own energy levels, and many others. It's not subtle, it's radical. It just takes some detective work. Here's what could be going wrong:
A better way to take supplements is to start by considering all the possible contributing factors to your exhaustion or other symptoms. This is best done through blood tests where available, and the guidance of a nutritionist or naturopath to guide supplement choices to address deficits.
Where energy comes from.
In order to establish why you feel exhausted, it’s helpful to know some of the major bodily processes that keep our energy levels healthy, and the nutrients that support these processes.
So with all of the above contributors to our sensation of energy or exhaustion, where should we start? I suggest, start here:
Get enough sleep. This improves most hormone balances, particularly those related to stress. If you struggle with this, there’s more info here.
See your GP and discuss your symptoms to rule out any more serious issues. Ask for a blood test of iron levels, iron stores, vitamin B12, vitamin D, thyroid function, liver function, white blood cell counts (this will show if your body is fighting off an underlying infection)
If your iron stores are less than ideal (even if they’re still within range), or if your B12 is low, an iron, folate and B complex can make a huge difference. My friend put me onto this iron and B vitamin herbal drink and it’s made a huge difference to me. Bonus points for being easily digested and yum!
Most of us don’t have enough magnesium. It’s a mineral our body uses in over 300 processes, including recover from stress, muscle recovery after exertion, prevention of migraines, heart protection and manufacturing energy. The awesome thing is, we can take magnesium as a powder as magnesium glycinate or citrate and these can be in mixed formulations with other nutrients we need - it’s worth taking to a nutritionist or naturopath in a health food store to find the formulation most effective for you. Can you tell I’m a nutrition nerd and magnesium is one of my favourite nutrients? Magnesium can also be absorbed through the skin via bath flakes or oil. Magnesium is very safe and harmless to use when following instructions. About as therapeutic as a bath can get!
My other favourite is CoQ10. As well as being indicated for many burnout symptoms such as chronic fatigue, fibromyalgia, migraines and depression, it is also protective of our heart and brain. It can be taken on its own or in formulations with other nutrients for our energy factories such as lipoic acid, magnesium and B vitamins. Make sure you talk to a professional to get a good quality product.
Drink plenty of water. Our bodies are roughly 70% water, and we need it to maintain health, for example in keeping our blood circulating well, supporting our kidneys to flush out waste and generally maintaining our energy levels. If you struggle to drink 2 litres per day, some of this can have herbal tea or slices of lemon, cucumber and mint to add interest. Coffee doesn’t count! Eat loads of fibrous vegetables and fermented foods such as saurkraut, kimchi, kefir and kombucha. Make sure they have live bacteria mentioned on the label, or make your own.
I hope that this crash course in energy systems gives you some ideas of where to start looking in both determining some contributors to your energy, and places to start to feel better. Let me know below which tips you will be taking on and any questions you have in the comments below. Remember, while I have a degree in Applied Science (OT), I am mid-way through my naturopathy degree so this information is for stimulating your conversations with trained health professionals and your own research, not to be considered individual prescriptions. Links are affiliated, I only ever link to products I love and use myself. If you'd like to get in on the resilience conversation, join my cosy and kind Facebook group, Sisters With Heart.
Sometimes the simplest and most obvious solution is the one to go for. We don't always need to make life more complicated - it takes care of that for us! When we're burnt out and depleted, sleep is not the only tool we need. There are likely to be nutrient deficiencies, lifestyle changes and mind shifts required to get our sparks back. But sleep is foundational - nothing in our bodies works without it. Not too surprisingly, some studies show that people experiencing occupational burnout are more likely to have disturbed sleep. Even worse, loss of sleep results in increased cortisol levels... which continue to burn us out further.
When you're tired and wired at the same time, it's not that easy. These 9 strategies for better sleep will help:
One word of caution when it comes to sleep - too often I see someone implement just one or two strategies and then say "it didn't work". You don't know which of these - or more likely which combination - is right for you. So implement as many as you can, remembering to discuss any supplements with your health practitioner for the appropriateness in your situation first, and consider their use for short term adjustment rather than long term. Once you find yourself sleeping soundly, you can then determine which strategies are key for you. So I'd like to hear from you - which of these are you going to implement? Let me know in the comments below! And, sleep tight.
Most of the research above is provided in this book (affiliate link):
Have you ever had a complete spiral? I used to have a reputation for always smiling, and people told me that I never seemed phased by anything, nothing could keep me down. And for the most part, it was true. Sure life happened, and I would be heart-on-my-sleeve about it. Sometimes to the concern of my more stiff-upper-lip loved ones. But I would bounce back. And smile again.
But then a storm hit my life. This wasn't the raindrops on the roof kind I'd had before. It was a disorienting twister - everything I thought was up was down, and I found it hard to grab hold of anything. People stopped saying "You're always smiling, Kath!" and after a while I thought I'd forgotten how.
While it may have seemed at the time to come out of left field, the wisdom of hindsight has taught me that a lifetime of factors led to me hiding under my doona, overwhelmed by the challenges of the day and the reality that slapped me awake each morning. Sure, events happened at that time that anyone would struggle with. And they accumulated before I had a chance to bounce back. But the very part of me that seemed so resilient before was my undoing, and I had to learn again what resilience truly is.
First I need to say - the following are my observations and experiences and what I learnt for myself. Take what is useful and leave behind what is not. I absolutely can't tell you what is right for you.
The behaviours and coping strategies that lead to burnout.
Our coping strategies develop early in life. Without realising, certain of our behaviours are rewarded, others are not. So many, like myself, who end up in caring professions have a clear lifelong pattern of being rewarded by how much they care for and support others. If I ask my health professional friends if they were a caregiver or peacemaker in the home environment, most of them look at me with astonishment, as if they're wondering if I'm a bit psychic. Nope - I just know a pattern when I see one.
And while it's a beautiful thing to be so caring, underneath it all it becomes a prime way we receive validation from others, and this is when we care for others to the expense of ourselves. The risk is, for some of us, there's no amount of giving that can be enough. And eventually the well runs dry. You can spot whether you have this characteristic by considering whether you are very comfortable giving help, but very reluctant to ask for it. Red alert!
What happens in our body to cause burnout?
Without turning this post into a health lesson (and driving me back to my text books that I've been avoiding), burnout basically comes down to stress that is too much and for too long. Short term stress is part of our design and helps us deal with a big issue in front of us. But the way it does that is by activating three stress glands in our bodies: the hypothalamus, pituitary and adrenals. The chemicals they secrete give us the energy and alertness we need, but also increase our sensitivity, which means the next stressful event hits us harder than it would if we weren't so overstimulated. So if we keep getting new stresses before recovering from the last one, progressive dysfunction can occur from anxiety, to over-reactions, to under-reacting and depression and chronic physical conditions such as chronic fatigue and fibromylagia (stress is not the only cause but this is one possible path). This progression is burnout.
So I'm feeling burnt out, now what do I do?
When I was burnt out a few years ago, I realised that my way of functioning in the world of looking after others with no room for myself could no longer serve me (and perhaps never really had). When things were at their worst, I had to decide to step up... because no one could do it for me.
The 3 keys that together finally unlocked the puzzle were:
All of these areas are a work in progress, but they're everything to me and I've learnt so much from them. So watch this space... there will be loads more on these 3 principles to follow, because they are so pivotal to bringing our spark back.
Now I'd love to hear from you - what has been your experience of feeling burnt out? And which of these 3 tips will you be using? Let me know in the comments below! And if you'd like to start with self kindness (the foundational step) then get your free gift - 7 Steps to Self Love here.
A few days ago, I asked the awesome women in my Facebook group, Sisters With Heart, to show me the ingredients in their face creams so that I could write this article about getting to know what you're putting on your face - and the answers surprised me!
I was happy to see several women have already chosen products that include natural ingredients - but even these had a couple of "best avoided" chemicals. And the famous and popular face cream that one posted? Well, petroleum, coal tar and pig stomach....
The best database I have found to check ingredients - which I recommend to all of you (not affiliated, I just really want you to be informed) is the Environmental Working Group (EWG). If I don't discuss the ingredients in your face cream here, please check out the database.
Why we need to care about the ingredients in our face cream
So why should we care what's in our face cream, or any product? Of course - it's your choice. But I think it's important to make that choice an informed one. So here's the deal...
Many of us think of our skin as some kind of covering for our body, you know... to keep our innards in. But we forget that it's an organ in its own right. It absorbs some substances - this is how medications delivered by patches work, such as contraceptive patches, nicotine patches and pain killer patches. So we know that if our skin is absorbing some of the chemicals it comes in contact with, it's really worth knowing what those chemicals are. If you wouldn't swallow a substance, my thought is that you shouldn't put it on your skin either.
Why we can't rely on the idea that any cream we're allowed to buy is totally safe
But isn't it the job of some government body to test chemical safety? Sure, many countries have departments or agencies to test chemicals. But these testing programs have significant limitations. Here are just a few. Sometimes a chemical is tested for specific quickly occurring cancers and skin reactions, and is deemed safe - but once it is out in the population, a longer term different cancer form , or an untested issue such as disrupting our hormones, occurs. Another concern is that one specific chemical may be deemed safe, but it might often attract chemical contaminants that are carcinogenic or harmful in some way. And finally, chemicals are almost always tested individually. But in the real world, we are exposed to thousands of different chemicals, which all combine in our body. So perhaps an individual chemical in a small amount is tolerable... but when we add all the other chemicals, we have potentially unknown long term effects and amounts of chemicals loading in our system. Even worse, some of these chemicals break down very slowly and tend to accumulate, and we don't clear them from our body.
The dodgiest of the dodgy
So which are the worst chemicals found in face creams, with high hazard ratings by the EWG (or my "bin it and run" rating)? Some carcinogens I would suggest NOT putting on your face (or anywhere!):
Once you've binned anything you own with the above, the next are my "finish the jar if you're thrifty, then uplevel" rating. This is either because they have questionable effects or are derived from animal sources. Here's just a few, all of which were in the face creams of the women in my group:
All we really need in a face cream (don't believe the hype)
Don't worry beautiful - it's not all sheep sweat and hormone disruption! To be effective, all a face cream really needs is to have a mix of an oil and a water based ingredients with an emulsifier to hold it all together.
The reason we need both oil and water in a face cream, is that this more closely reflects the natural oil and water surface of our skin and so our skin more readily absorbs and uses the nutrients. If you're game to make your own, my calendula, rosehip oil and chamomile infusion face cream can be found here - you can change out the ingredients with other safe ones, as long as you keep the oil and water ratios the same.
And if you prefer to buy - watch out for the second post in this miniseries about face creams, where we'll chat about the natural and effective ingredients to look out for.
And now I'd like to hear from you - which of these ingredients did you discover in YOUR face cream? Let me know below!
Running out of time.
How do you feel when you read these words? If you're anything like me, you can sense your stress levels starting to rise. Maybe you feel exhausted just thinking about it. Or overwhelmed.
The funny thing is, we are feeding ourselves these messages constantly. Even on a day off, I find myself trying to squeeze a certain amount in. Get to the shops before they close. Write an article before dinner. Draft an assignment before bed. Need to get 8 hours sleep.
No wonder many of us always feel background stress and fatigue - our time focus wears us out!
Time, time, time.
There are only truly 3 moments in time - the past, the present and the future. We know that when we spend too long looking back, we can feel sadness and loss from past hurts or moments that are now gone.But when we spend our lives looking minutes or hours into the future, we build up stress and anxiety from the constant sense of having to handle something before it has even happened. So what can we do about time crunch? Surely it's just inevitable in today's world?
Yes and no.
Achieving a certain level of productivity is required (although not always at the level we expect from ourselves - but that's another story). But always looking forward to the next obligation does not help us complete what is in front of us now.
Two strategies help me to have high productive/ low stress days:
1. Plan the day to fit in the top priorities. If they need to fit within specific times, use the alarm feature on your phone to keep you on track. This way you can safely immerse yourself in the task you are doing, knowing time is taking care of itself and you will receive a cue when it's time to switch your focus. This deceptively simple strategy reduces overwhelm by allowing focus on just the one task you are doing, rather than running a background monologue in your mind of tracking time and thinking of what's coming next.
2. As often as you can, give yourself a break from clocks and watches altogether. It doesn't matter if this is for an afternoon, an evening or a whole day. But when you have no serious deadlines, take off your watch and immerse yourself in what you are doing. This is a perfect way to practice mindfulness in our lives. It creates better connections with whoever we are spending our day with, and more efficiency in tasks and enjoyment in leisure activities.
Because beyond time, we enter the state of timelessness. And there is peace to be found when we're there.
I'd love to hear about YOUR relationship with time! Let me know how you deal with the time crunch in the comments below, and which of these tips you'll be trying out.
And if you'd like to have some guidelines on clearing your schedule, sign up for this free & effective mini course to Reclaim Your Me Time.
I rushed around the corner in the bustling office, and stopped short - just - of hurtling into a guy I work with, who was hurrying towards me. "Sorry!" I exclaimed before we both ran our separate ways.
At face value, there is nothing noteworthy in this anecdote. It is mundane. We have all rushed through a busy workplace and almost bumped into a colleague, and rushed on. And yet, something about it stayed with me. I realised, looking back, that my automatic response in a situation we co-created, was to apologise. His was not. I began observing how often women apologise when they have done nothing wrong.
She apologises as she squeezes past other people in the row as she moves towards her seat. She is not late, and the seat was allocated to her. But she instinctively apologises just for making her way to it, as she sees it inconveniencing the people she must pass.
A group of women see a movie and discuss its merits. One of them has a different perspective. "Sorry, I don't see it that way" she hesitantly expresses her opinion.
A woman has her dream come true. She is ecstatic - except that her closest friend has had a run of bad luck and is miserable. She almost feels she can't share her fortune with her closest friend, "Sorry, I know this is hard for you, but I'm pregnant." Or, "Sorry this happens after your redundancy, but I got that promotion". If you haven't observed this yourself, trust me that it happens. Women apologising for their good fortune, or that their hard work has brought rewards.
There will be two types of responses to the words above. One will be, "Wow, I didn't realise how much I apologise for no good reason!" and the other will be "But these women are just being polite, isn't that a good thing?"
In short, no. I believe these unnecessary apologies are extremely unhealthy. They may serve as social lubricant, but at too great a cost - the self worth of women.
You see, self worth is a two way street. How we feel about ourselves affects what we say - particularly our feeling of needing to apologise for ourselves. And our apologising for ourselves then feeds our low self worth. In essence, if we have done nothing cruel or harmful, what are we apologising for? For taking up space? For having our own thoughts and opinions? For being fortunate or happy? What is it in ourselves that would need to apologise for these things, other than a core belief that we are not worthy? And when we hear ourselves saying these words, are we not reinforcing our unworthiness?
Make a pact with yourself now - that you will stop apologising in situations where you have not caused harm. It is not your role to convenience others at the expense of yourself. It is not your role to bite your tongue and nod at the opinions you disagree with. Nor is it your role to hide in yourself and try your best not to occupy space.
It is your role to stand up. It is your role to own your space. We need you to speak up, and speak out. The world needs you to shine your light - unapologetically. You need you to shine your light.
Start by saving the word "sorry" for real transgressions. You are listening - don't apologise for your existence. And forgive yourself when the words slip out from habit. Just observe and take note.
So here's what to do instead:
If you recognise yourself in the words above, there is only one "sorry" I'd like you to say.
Say sorry to yourself: for negating your rights to take up space, have a viewpoint or be happy. Look into your heart and make this vow, "I no longer apologise for being me. I support my inherent right to take up space, be true to my values and beliefs, and claim my happiness".
And to everyone else who misses the doormat? That's simple. Say: "Sorry, not sorry".
Now I'd like to hear from you. Do you ever catch yourself apologising for yourself? What new strategies are you going to use instead? Let me know in the comments below.
And if you recognised yourself in these words and would like to reclaim your right to self worth and self love, grab your free 7 steps to self love guide here.
It happens like clock work. I become inspired to get healthy. Things go pretty well. Maybe I have more energy, or lose a bit of weight. I might even get a few compliments. And then, it's weird. I reach a certain point and a trigger goes off. Maybe the trigger is a stressful day. Or lack of planning. Or being tired. And then I find myself with a packet of crisps in my hand eating them like I'm a kid who's found the lolly jar and about to get caught. I don't take a dainty nibble. I eat them all. Then I feel derailed and angry at the seemingly senseless nature of my behaviour.
It's not just limited to junk food either. It can be a study schedule in my naturopathy degree. Or progressing in my career. Or an exercise plan. Anything at all. Things go well for so long and then I make choices that are off point and sometimes detrimental.
Why would someone who is all about self love and resilience even admit to this? And why would this happen?
I admit to it because it's a part of self love. When we truly love someone we love all of them unconditionally... and that includes ourselves. Gay Hendricks writes about our "upper limits" in his brilliant book, The Big Leap . You see, we all have an upper limit. We all reach a point of progress in our lives that triggers the need for self sabotage. Obviously as we become healthier in terms of self love, our upper limit expands and we allow ourselves more happiness and success.
So this brings me to the questions - what is there to love about self sabotage?! How on earth, when I find myself standing in the pantry foraging for MSG-flavoured crisps, can I love myself in that moment? And whatever your sabotage story looks like - how can you love your sabotage and your self in the midst of what feels like failure?
Sabotage shows us our limits. It is our teacher and our friend.
That's right folks. You know that teacher who finally helped you get your head around algebra? And that friend who very kindly told you that yes, your bum does look big in that.... the same way you love them, love sabotage. It is pointing something out to you. It is teaching you. You may not want to hear the lesson, but it loves you so much it will teach you anyway. Now when I find myself with a face full of potato, I ask myself,
The answers always point me to growth and the next step in my development. Try for yourself next time you find yourself in sabotage, and let me know what lessons are given to you.
Everything that isn't love, is a call for love
One of my favourite teachers, Marianne Williamson, in her book A Return To Love, shows us that our spiritual growth requires us to see all behaviour (others' and our own) as either love or a call for love. I'm no guru, but I would say inhaling deep fried carbs falls into the latter category.
From this perspective it is easy to reframe my self sabotage as a call for love from myself not a reason to hate on myself. In fact, heaping criticism on myself in these moments only pulls me further from where I want to be.
Now, once I have seen the lesson in the moment, I make a shift from sabotage to self love. I invite you to try the same. I ask myself,
If you're finding yourself in self sabotage, just take a breath and be kind to yourself my friend. Chances are, you've just discovered your call for love. Answer it.
I'd love to hear from you - how do you nurture yourself and grow from self sabotage? Which of the suggestions above speak to you?
If you'd like to develop a bit more kindness to yourself, I invite you to receive my free guide, 7 Steps to Self Love.
NB. All books linked on this website are affiliate links. I only link to books that absolutely rock my world.